I had been working on an important project with my husband that I had to finish that required every waking hour of our weekend. Apparently, I like to challenge myself with intense projects and little time to do them. This specific project was no different, I had a tight deadline and was determined to meet it. Unfortunately, this meant locking my son away in his room so we would not be disrupted. Doing so bothered me more than him as he loves his small oasis away from his parents. But still...
To make up for my 'neglect' (if it's possible to neglect a thirty-one-year-old) I decided to spend the Monday after, giving him all of my attention, not allowing for any distractions. I took him on a date, something we do now and again.
I let him choose where we would be having lunch and he decided on Red Robin. Moments after we were seated, we were greeted by our friendly server. She spoke directly to Matt, asking what he would like to drink and if he knew what he wanted to order. "Yes, I want a strawberry lemonade with a bacon cheeseburger and fries." I can tell when someone speaks to him, it makes him feel important, and that means the world to me.
As we waited for our food it was clear that he was enjoying himself, actually having a conversation with me, sharing his observation of all the unique décor that covered the walls. Donna checked back on us often giving him knuckles every time he extended his fist, which was a lot, but she did not act annoyed by it.
Our food arrived and things got quiet at our table as we savored every bite. Our drinks were getting low, and Donna noticed. She came over to see if we would like a refill. My son answered quickly with a "Sure!" and then he followed with "I want to take you on a date." The fish on my fork that was about to meet its fate in my mouth stopped midway there. Say what? My mind raced. Why did he just say that? He'd had plenty of exposure to friendly servers in the past and had never asked any of them out. He then said, "I have Down syndrome" and she smiled at him and said, "I know and there is nothing wrong with that." She smiled at him sweetly and knuckled him again before moving on to her next table. My mama's heart was exploding. I smiled, proud of him and thankful for her kindness.
For years I have asked if he has any interest in dating and his response has always been "Mom, don't be silly, I can't. I have wife. I married to Katy Perry". Why was his response different today? I could not understand why he suddenly had this urge to ask someone out on a date. When I asked him why the change, he brought up the series on Netflix we had been watching called Love on the Spectrum. It became obvious to me that he had been resonating with this show, really paying attention, and now showing an interest in pursuing love. Yay! As I mention in my book, "Big People Don't Pee in the Park", I am not giving up hope. Even though he's married, there is a part of him that wishes to date someone that is within his reach.
We finished our lunch, and he wished Donna a nice day before moving on to our next destination. If only we could all take rejection so easily.
I have two takeaways from this experience 1) I need to teach my son not to ask out another woman when he's already on a date and already married and 2) Disregard what I said in #1. Single male, looking for single girl to take on a date. He loves movies, music and Disney and has a funtastic sense of humor.
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